“Anaconda: Classic JLo Film Lands on Max”
A nostalgic pastime is about to get a digital facelift. You remember Anaconda, right? The 1997 crowd-pleaser that starred our beloved J.Lo plus Ice Cube, Jon Voight, and Eric Stoltz. Guess what? It’s slithering its way to Max for a September 1 release. Yes, the one about that high-spirited National Geographic film crew taken hostage by a wild-eyed hunter.
Isn’t life always interesting? This hunter forces them, in a team-building exercise straight out of corporate hell, to track the world’s mightiest serpent. Anaconda sure ain’t alone either. It’s joining The Martian, another unforgettable cinematic experience featuring Matt Damon lost in space next month.
The Barely There Ratings and All Star Cast
If you’re wondering about the good, the bad and the ugly, Anaconda has it in abundance. And here’s the receipt – it’s sitting at “so bad it’s good” scores of 41% and 24% from professional killjoys and normal folks respectively on Rotten Tomatoes. You see, it’s not just J.Lo, Ice Cube, Voight, and Stoltz having a great time in the jungle.
There’s Owen Wilson too, for an extra dash of charming sarcasm; Danny Trejo, when you need a machete-wielding guru; and Jonathan Hyde, so we all can practice our ‘Help! I’m being swallowed by a giant python’ screams at home.
It’s a Writer’s World
Now, let’s delve into the magic makers, the true unsung heroes – the writers. Hands up for Hans Bauer, Jim Cash, and Jack Epps Jr. who deserve some applause. Bauer’s repertoire includes Titan A.E., Komodo, and most recently, The Flock in 2007 – works of a true lover of the exotic.
Next up is Cash. You’ll know him from the uber-iconic Top Gun and the simply unforgettable Dick Tracy. Epps Jr. also scribbled down Top Gun and contributed to its sequel, Top Gun: Maverick.
And who could forget the ever-keen Luis Llosa? This is the director who gave us the thrilling The Specialist, the eye-popping Fire on the Amazon, the heart-stopping Sniper and the mouth-dropping Eight Hundred Leagues Down the Amazon. Not too shabby, eh?
J.Lo: A Woman for All Decades
Speaking of not too shabby, Jennifer Lopez still keeps us on our toes, even in her mid-50s. Recently, we caught her in Atlas playing opposite of Sterling K. Brown and Simu Liu. She also did a one-woman army stint in The Mother for Netflix in 2023 and colorfully misfired in Shotgun Wedding with Josh Duhamel and Lenny Kravitz.
She’s not stopping, either. Next on her to-do list is joining Bobby Cannavale and Don Cheadle in Unstoppable, a biopic about wrestler Anthony Robles.
Anaconda Alert
Long story short, Anaconda; a blast from the past, starring Jennifer Lopez and Owen Wilson, and concocted by the ingenious minds of Hans Bauer, Jim Cash, and Jack Epps Jr., is set to hit Max on September 1. Keep an eye out. You can count on us for more updates. But more importantly, prepare your popcorn and get ready for some nostalgic cinematic pleasures. Trust us, it’s going to be a hoot!
Read this article and more at August Tales Comics. Your go-to site for trade paperback exchanges and comic book news! Trade. Read. Repeat.
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